If there was a list of Frequently Asked Questions of the holiday season, there’s one that I think might rise to the very top that would actually have nothing to do with the season: “What’s new?” You’ll get asked this by friends you’re reconnecting with, relatives you haven’t seen in a long time, even new people you meet for the first time at holiday parties. It sounds like a simple enough of a question to answer and it gets asked all the time, but it often catches me off guard. As innocuous of a question as it may be, it’s one that really deserves more than the usual passing reply of, “Hmmm, not much.”
If you think about it, nothing could be new to you – at least from your own perspective it may not really feel like all that much is new. But from someone else’s perspective, everything could be new.
This is all beside the point, though. When someone asks you, “What’s new?” they’re really doing more than just asking you what’s new. What they’re really doing is inviting you into a conversation. “What’s new?” is a way to find something you can talk about, and being asked you “what’s new” gives you the opportunity to share whatever’s been capturing your attention or keeping you occupied lately.
If you answer with, “Hmm. Not much…” (the way I often do) you pretty much kill the conversation. But if, instead, you start talking about your latest hobby, or a new project at work, then at least you’ll have something to carry the conversation through. The trick, I’m finding, is to add some focus to the question. Instead of just thinking, “what’s new”, I’m trying to add to it and by framing the question with a little more context, even if I’m not asked. For example, I’ll frame things in my own head thinking about what’s new:
at work
with my hobbies
with my family
with my goals
This last one is the one that I’m finding is really getting the most traction – and it’s also the most helpful for myself. Every time I’m asked “what’s new?” I’m now trying to remember any new goals I’ve set for myself, and then also trying to use this question as an opportunity to share my goals with other people.
The real appeal here is that people naturally respond to goals. There’s something innately interesting about hearing what other people are working towards, and talking about goals can be a good way to get feedback or advice that will help you reach your goals.
The gotcha is that I now need to be prepared to answer the question with my goals, which in turn means I need to be clear in my own head on what exactly my goals are! ..which I’m working on…and seems to be a continual work-in-progress…So I guess for the time being, when someone asks me what’s new, I can say that I’m working on answering that question! Ahhh circular irony.
What’s New?
If you think about it, nothing could be new to you – at least from your own perspective it may not really feel like all that much is new. But from someone else’s perspective, everything could be new.
This is all beside the point, though. When someone asks you, “What’s new?” they’re really doing more than just asking you what’s new. What they’re really doing is inviting you into a conversation. “What’s new?” is a way to find something you can talk about, and being asked you “what’s new” gives you the opportunity to share whatever’s been capturing your attention or keeping you occupied lately.
If you answer with, “Hmm. Not much…” (the way I often do) you pretty much kill the conversation. But if, instead, you start talking about your latest hobby, or a new project at work, then at least you’ll have something to carry the conversation through. The trick, I’m finding, is to add some focus to the question. Instead of just thinking, “what’s new”, I’m trying to add to it and by framing the question with a little more context, even if I’m not asked. For example, I’ll frame things in my own head thinking about what’s new:
This last one is the one that I’m finding is really getting the most traction – and it’s also the most helpful for myself. Every time I’m asked “what’s new?” I’m now trying to remember any new goals I’ve set for myself, and then also trying to use this question as an opportunity to share my goals with other people.
The real appeal here is that people naturally respond to goals. There’s something innately interesting about hearing what other people are working towards, and talking about goals can be a good way to get feedback or advice that will help you reach your goals.
The gotcha is that I now need to be prepared to answer the question with my goals, which in turn means I need to be clear in my own head on what exactly my goals are! ..which I’m working on…and seems to be a continual work-in-progress…So I guess for the time being, when someone asks me what’s new, I can say that I’m working on answering that question! Ahhh circular irony.